Wednesday, June 07, 2006

My Neighbors' Rampant (Accidental) Nudity

A little while ago, a couple moved into the ground floor of the apartment building adjacent to our house. These people did not have blinds, curtains, or drapes, and would often wander around semi-clothed (or, on a couple of occasions, not clothed at all). They did this for at least a month and a half, and during that time I dubbed them The Exhibitionists, even though they got rather jumpy and would scatter like roaches when they realized people were walking past their wide-open window. However, they eventually got blinds, and they now keep their rustling behind their cloth barriers...until tonight. As I came in the door tonight, I turned to lock it behind me and saw a rustling from their apartment window, as the couple - who'd been in a naked embrace on the couch - scrambled to close their blinds. Ironically, if they hadn't moved, I would have likely have simply locked the door and gone downstairs, not noticing anything amiss, but the quick motion and curtain rustling drew my attention immediately. (My discomfort with public nudity aside, I must say that I'm glad it was the guy who got up to close the blinds while the girl laid on the couch in sheer terror.)

How hard is it for these people to remember to close their blinds? It's not like this is the first time something like this has happened to them, and they're certainly not hoping to catch people looking at them. Either a) they have no executive functioning or b) they're just so attracted to each other that they lose their minds and forget basic steps, like "close the curtains" or "take beer cans off couch before lovemaking."


Red-headed Dynamo said...

"Baby, I wanna f**k you right now, but let's get out of harm's way first..."

Yeah, I think David Cross said it best!

The Doc said...

That is exactly what I came to my mind when I went downstairs and started writing about it. Curse your off-center wit, Cross!

Jeans said...

They should learn to either close their blinds intentionally, or just embrace their exhibitionism and let it all hang out.

Am I right guys?

Jago said...

Jeans should learn to update her journal a lot more often, and I'm aware of the irony of a guy with a month between posts saying this.

Am I right, guys?

Jeans said...

I have! I have!

Look! Look! :)

Jago=also a slow updater