Tuesday, June 10, 2008
It's all nothing but cold calculations
There were lights flashing red and blue on the walls of my living room about ten minutes ago. I stepped outside and saw ten police cars and two EMS vans on the street and avenue around my place. People were gathered on the corners, looking down the avenue Westwards; a few TV and still cameras were setting up. As I was asking the people on the corners what was going on, nobody seemed to know; "They're looking for someone" seemed to be the best that I could get from anyone. And the police officers didn't look like they were going to take any time out to explain things to me, moving around with quiet, determined efficiency. One officer walked by me, not two meters away, with an assault rifle strapped to his chest. I'd never seen an assault rifle up close before. That one gun made me more scared than all the police cars and all the quiet put together. Something was happening right outside my window and nobody could tell me what was going on. I'd never felt scared living here before. And I'm sure it'll go away, this feeling, but right now I don't think I've ever been so unsettled in my whole life.